Tag Archives: #relationships

Spirituality

The Middle Ground

It seems like some people have drawn their lines in the sand. For reasons I don’t completely understand, part of the population has decided their politics are the most important thing in their lives. Some people have sacrificed friendships and family over political differences. What happened to the middle ground?

Personally, I have friends all across the political spectrum. Our relationship is based upon our shared values and common interests. We may see the political landscape differently, and that’s okay. We respect each other’s right to vote the way we want.

Some people find joy in hurling insults at people over the internet. That’s weak. If name calling and pejoratives are all you have, then I question what you really believe.

Everyone wants to find purpose in this life. Each of us has been given special talents to accomplish our purpose. Perhaps yelling about political differences makes people feel like they are accomplishing something, and they are! They are driving others away.

Find the middle ground. Connect with other good people. Focusing on one lane of the superhighway might cause you to miss something. And that includes people…

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Spirituality

When An Atheist Makes An Introduction

In 2025, a longtime client of mine referred me to an acquaintance of his. My client said, “he’s a Bible thumper like you (referring to me).” The introduction was made, and I immediately liked Brian, the referral. He’s a good, good-hearted man who, like me, believes in and worships Jesus.

Much good has come from the introduction. Yes, Brian became a client, but the relationship is much more than that. When we meet for coffee, we have meaningful conversations and I leave the meeting after learning from Brian.

God uses all of us to accomplish His purpose in this world. All of us includes believers and nonbelievers alike. God continues working on my atheist client, and He never gives up like humans do.

Never underestimate the power of our Creator. He is good all the time…

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Spirituality

The Enemy Within

A couple of years ago I read two scientific articles that said, according to their research, around 80% of adults in the United States didn’t like themselves. Eighty percent? This shocked me. Then I thought about it.

Every day you see people tearing others down in the public forum known as the internet. People use their keyboards and phone screens to say things they wouldn’t say in person. Their passive-aggressive behavior reigns.

Jesus told us to “love our neighbors as we love ourselves.” When fear, anger and even hatred are settled in the heart of man, they will destroy you from within. How can you feel good about yourself with those ruling your inner psyche? You will do further harm by expressing yourself in a way that damages others. It’s a never ending cycle of futility.

Fear, anger and hate are rooted in unresolved issues that require forgiveness. Make no mistake, forgiveness is hard and it isn’t automatic. True forgiveness takes time. It cannot be forced.

I encourage you to continue working on yourself. When the enemy within needs forgiveness, face it. You, and your relationship with others, will benefit. After all, forgiveness is for you, not the offender…

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Spirituality, Uncategorized

The Search for Peace

Some people thrive in chaos. They love to stir things up. When things are calm, it’s almost like peace makes them uncomfortable.

Peace and contentment go together. Contentment gets a bad rap. If you are considered to be a contented person, people start to believe you are devoid of ambition. This may be true for some, but not for me.

My life is full. I’m still enjoying a career I love, and I have a few other things that not only keep me busy, but they bring fulfillment. Yet, if I never accomplish anything else, I’m at peace with it.

You create your own environment. Keep the chaotic people away. If someone doesn’t bring peace into my life, they will never be part of my inner sphere.

I encourage you to do the same. Peace is priceless…

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Spirituality

What’s In A Name?

Our foundations are in our family and our name. We are born into a legacy that existed before us, and it will continue after we are gone. What we choose to do with it is up to us.

God thought of us individually before the world was formed. He decided the era we would be born in. Many times I have been grateful to be alive during the time of indoor plumbing and air conditioning (I live in Texas. It gets hot!).

The family I was born into was a mess. There was insecurity, fear, and sometimes, violence. My brain was in a constant state of “fight or flight.” Fortunately, I have been able to reprogram my mind, but it took time and effort. Not everyone takes the steps to heal.

The legacy I am creating with my children is healthier than that which I experienced. For this, I am forever grateful to God for guiding my steps. He is good.

Be proud of your name. God didn’t make a mistake. If your family was a train wreck like mine, you can change, if you’re willing.

Be willing…

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Spirituality

Beneath the Surface

Surface conversations last about a minute with me. Time is precious and I refuse to use it engaging in meaningless talk. Learning about people in a deeper sense is an art form, in a way. And I do love the arts!

People and their life stories are fascinating to me. My insatiable curiosity is one of the reasons I podcast. Everyone wants to be seen, heard and understood. Sharing their stories publicly allows others to open up a bit, knowing complete strangers will learn about them. It requires courage.

And speaking of the arts, one of my favorite bands is the Goo Goo Dolls. In their song, “Iris,” the lyrics are “And I don’t want the world to see me, ‘cause I don’t think that they’d understand. When everything’s meant to be broken, I just want you to know who I am.” Did you catch it? One man who desires to hide from the world, but wants to be fully known by one person. It’s a beautiful, telling lyric.

Try to get to know people for who they are, not what they can do for you. Be relational, not transactional…

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Spirituality

Was It Worth It?

During my life I have observed people who spent more time trying to build wealth than anything else. In a moment of confession, I have been guilty of doing the same. I’m one of the fortunate ones. Having children changed my perspective.

When the end of life comes, no matter how much you have accumulated, none of it goes into eternity with you. Great fortunes have been built, only to be pissed away by future generations. Was it worth it?

The most important thing is people. Relationships, like wealth and resources, must be built. They require time and effort. And just like our bank accounts, they can be lost quickly.

My encouragement to you is, take the time to be close to those who are important to you. Do it before the relationships are too far gone to repair. Keep showing up, even if this makes you uncomfortable. You will be creating a lasting legacy no one can put a price on…

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Spirituality

Conflict Resolution

Resolving conflicts is necessary for healthy relationships. You will have disagreements but they don’t have to shred the relationship. Successful conflict resolution begins with trust.

Divorce rates have come down some, yet still hover around 44%. It is estimated that 80% of the couples who stay together aren’t fulfilled in their marriages. Part of the issue is we don’t know how to resolve conflicts in a healthy way. This has generational implications.

We are taught how to argue by watching our parents. If one parent strong arms the other, we learn it’s “my way or the highway.” That’s not going to work in the long run because the counter party feels unimportant. Resentments build, and if they go unexpressed it turns to bitterness. Bitterness destroys you from the inside.

From my own observations around 80% of families are dysfunctional. It’s the same for one parent homes. Kids need structure to feel secure. If they aren’t getting it at home they will find it somewhere.

If dealing with conflict is a challenge for you, I encourage you to learn how to do it better by reading books and periodicals. Practice. Be willing to listen to the person you are in conflict with. Communicate how you feel.

This might make you uncomfortable, but staying comfortable never works. You can learn and grow, even through conflict…

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Spirituality, Uncategorized

Reports Don’t Tell You Everything

Have you ever seen a marketing report? They are not only boring, they can be highly inaccurate. Yet corporate America continues to spend millions of dollars on them.

People want relationships which are more than transactional. Relationships are built on trust. Remember those market reports from above? Agencies even query consumers about which brands they trust. Again, costing millions of dollars that could be used to improve products.

There is one true source that cannot let us down. It talks about trust and incudes pieces on how to market effectively. I’m talking about the Bible. The Bible shows us that time and time again we can trust God. He tells us to be fair and equitable in dealing with others. Your reputation spread by word of mouth is the best marketing tool available. Your reputation is built by being trustworthy, treating people fairly.

Spend time with people. Strengthen your relationships. Stay in touch. You can read the marketing reports later…

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Spirituality

The “In Crowd”

When we were growing up, there were different groups of kids who hung around together. Popular kids, athletes, nerds, thugs and the rest existed within the same school. Sometimes the lines blurred between them.

In school, I got along with each group quite well. I marched to my own drumbeat and that rhythm didn’t necessarily fit into any one group. My friends are still spread across a diverse mosaic. Each person brings their unique song into the mix.

When my son was getting into trouble years ago, people would say “he’s just hanging around with the wrong crowd.” To me, that was just an excuse. You see, he chose the crowd. My son had solid character, and he eventually straightened his life out. But we get to choose who we associate with.

We are a product of our environment. Sometimes people are just transitory in your life. They aren’t meant to stay. Hang on to the ones who challenge you, who bring out the best in you. And you should do the same for them.

Those people are a treasure…

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