Category Archives: Uncategorized

Spirituality, Uncategorized

In Agreement

When we were little children we were told we should get along with others. The teachers didn’t show us how to resolve conflicts, though. We learned how to do that through after school fights on the playground!

In life, we like to see the adults play nice. We hope our world leaders can resolve differences without going to war. And we really like it when our politicians show civility to each other after brutal, nasty elections.

In case you haven’t noticed, people are at each other’s throats over political differences. Self-righteousness is on display daily on social media. Lifelong friendships have been left in tatters due to unresolvable conflicts. I believe we can do better, if we are willing.

I don’t have to agree with you to like you. If you are a good person, doing good in the world and caring for your fellow man, I’m okay with you. Over the course of my life I have observed that most people are good at heart. And it’s the heart that matters most.

My encouragement to you is to look for the good in the world. It’s there! Sometimes you gotta look hard to find it, but it’s there. And if you aren’t seeing it, change the lens you are seeing through…

Standard
Uncategorized

Parents

When I became a father, I had no idea how to do the job. I had no skills because I had a terrible father. He was a cruel, angry, abusive man. All I knew was I didn’t want to be like him.

Fortunately, there are tons of good books available about parenting. So, I read many of them. And I sought out the advice of men I knew who had raised good children. I’m proud to say my two sons turned out well. They are good young men who have solid character. I will say their teenage years gave me a head of grey hair!

When my kids were in school, I saw parents who believed their children could do no wrong. If they got in trouble at school, it was the teachers fault. Some parents even lobbied the school to give their children better grades than they had earned. Those kids were being set up for failure later in life as they learned how the world works.

Parents are the first teachers children have. The little ones are always watching, learning their behavior from dad and mom.

If you are fortunate enough to be a parent, teach them well. And if you, like me, didn’t have good parents, you can learn…

Standard
Spirituality, Uncategorized

There’s Always a Critic

Have you noticed how the court of public opinion passes judgment without knowing all the facts? People can look at the world through a lens of biases which cloud clear thinking.

The “Make America Healthy Again” movement has no shortage of uneducated critics. Since it’s associated with the Trump administration, it must be wrong! No, it’s not wrong. Obesity, especially in children, has risen to epidemic levels. Autism has gone from 1 in 10,000 to 1 in 31 children. Science is constantly asking why. It’s a good and fair question.

The pharmaceutical lobby is the largest in the world. They certainly have their own share of biases. Keep America fat and unhealthy and they have a customer for life. There is solid research dating back to the 1940’s that demonstrates the efficacy of psychedelics. They remain schedule 1 drugs because the pharmaceutical lobby says they should.

Do your own research. Remove bias from your thinking. If you conclude that your opinion is supported by facts, then stick with it. But if you learn something new that’s different from your prior beliefs, be willing to accept it…

Standard
Spirituality, Uncategorized

Confession

It feels good to talk about things, doesn’t it? There’s much freedom that comes from unburdening yourself of your troubles.

Trigger warning: this is a dark story I’m about to tell you.

Last week, I was doing a round of volunteer speaking in prisons. On Wednesday morning, a few women inmates were sharing stories about their lives. One of the women said, “I was raped by my father from the time I was 3 until I was 13 and I ran away from home.” She went on to say that she had never told anyone until that moment. It’s heartbreaking to think about what she had been carrying inside for years, never talking about it. I cannot imagine what causes someone to harm an innocent child. He was a very sick fuck.

Everyone has a story. They aren’t always pretty. The woman I described above took her first step toward healing by talking about what happened to her. I asked her how it felt to tell someone and she said it felt good.

We need good people in our lives, people we can confide in who won’t judge us. Confession is a good first step to becoming whole…

Standard
Uncategorized

In An Instant

We live life in a hurry, don’t we? We have instant grits, fast food and convenience stores. All of these things are designed to save us time. The less time we spend doing menial things, the more time we have to do other stuff. But there are trade offs.

Fast food doesn’t mean healthy food. Convenience stores offer fewer choices than supermarkets, and they are more expensive to shop in. And, of course, instant grits don’t measure up to the twenty minutes grits!

By taking shortcuts, we might be robbing ourselves of the sense of accomplishment we gain. There’s no quick way to get in shape and build muscle. Talk to text is a good alternative when we need to remember something. However, writing hits the same spot in the brain that meditation does. Taking an extra moment to write has more benefits than just the thing we need to remind ourselves of.

Slow down, just a little. Your effectiveness rises when you do…

Standard
Uncategorized

Memorial Day

Tomorrow in the United States we will observe Memorial Day. The first official Memorial Day was in 1868 when it was called Decoration Day. It’s not a day of celebration, but a day of mourning and remembering those who died for the sake of freedom.

The day is also considered the beginning of summer. School is out, the flowers and grass are fully bloomed. It’s a bit ironic that life is in full bloom while we remember those who died. Yet, the cycle continues.

Please take a moment to reflect on what Memorial Day means. Say a silent prayer for the families of the deceased. Pray for peace in the world. And never forget…

Standard
Uncategorized

Starbucks

Coffee is my favorite drink in the morning. I easily drink 48 ounces of coffee every day. In the times I have abstained from coffee it has rewarded me with a headache!

Starbucks was started in 1971 by three friends who wanted to bring dark roast coffee to Seattle. In the beginning they only sold beans. People loved the flavor so the business thrived. Today there are over 40,000 Starbucks stores all over the world.

I have read about people who boycott Starbucks for a variety of social reasons. That’s their choice. I love their coffee, and the workers tend to be friendly. That’s good for a store that is trying to sell you something!

If you haven’t, I encourage you to give Starbucks a try. If you don’t like coffee, they sell lots of other stuff. And you’ll be supporting the workers with your patronage.

Standard
Uncategorized

I’m Flattered

Oscar Wilde wrote “imitation is the sincerest form of flattery that mediocrity can pay to greatness.” There is much to unravel with Wilde’s quote, but for brevity’s sake let’s stick with flattery.

It’s nice to receive a compliment. Being confident in yourself and your abilities allows you to accept the compliment with humility and appreciation. I have had been privileged to have dinner with some accomplished people in the acting and sports world. To a person, each one realized how fortunate they were to have had such great success in their respective fields. No arrogance or rudeness, even when dinner was interrupted by people seeking autographs and pictures.

There are people who try to flatter others thinking they will get something in return. The fakes are pretty easy to spot.

I encourage you to look for ways to pass on compliments when you can. Remember that it’s not always about you. Be sincere. Write a short note to people you admire. Sincere flattery can go a long way when offered in the right way…

Standard
Uncategorized

Gift Giving

When I was a child, I would return to school after the Christmas break and all the kids in my class had the same question: “what did you get?” We were more curious about the quality and quantity of gifts we received rather than why we celebrated Christmas.

Fast forward to today, my sons tell me I’m difficult to buy for because there isn’t anything I really want or need. That’s true! All I want is to spend time with them. They are busy building their lives and we don’t get to see each other often. So, their time is the best gift I could receive.

When I buy gifts for others, I do my best to put thought into it. What will be important to the recipient and touch them in the heart is what I’m seeking. Thoughtfulness says more than the cost or opulence of a present.

As I have gotten older and perhaps wiser, I have learned that the greatest gift we have to offer is our time. Time is something we can never get back. Spend it well…

Standard
Uncategorized

Protein

If you are new to exercise, it’s important to watch what you eat to achieve your best results. Oftentimes I see people begin getting in shape, but they eat like a rabbit. Substituting a salad for a beautifully grilled ribeye is a mistake!

Protein provides the building blocks to build muscle. If you rob your body of protein, your body will turn on you. It requires you to feed it what it needs.

A word of caution: there are people who swear by an all-beef diet. You should find what is best for you. A diet without fresh vegetables might not be optimal. Do some research. Consult a nutritionist. Your body is a machine. Treat it right and it will last a long time.

Lifting weights, Pilates and walking are a nice combination. Try them, but don’t forget the protein!

Standard