Little children threaten to run away from home when they don’t get their way. It’s kinda funny when you think about it. The kid is five and he can’t drive. How far will those little legs get you?
When I was a child, my home life was one of stress, chaos and violence. My mind was in a constant state of “fight or flight.” I wanted to run away but was too scared to actually do it.
Confusion reigned in me. The television shows in those days were typically about family life. Seeing TV families and how they functioned together made me wonder why my family was so screwed up. I was naive, too, because I didn’t understand that the shows were scripted.
My choice as a young adult was to try to run away from myself. Drugs and alcohol numbed me from the pain I felt. But when I sobered up the life I was running from was still there. Einstein’s quote about insanity being doing the same thing over and over again but expecting different results was my life.
Through psychotherapy I was able to jettison the doubts and insecurities I took into adulthood. It took work, but today I’m free of the need to run away from who I am and who God created me to be. There are still challenges in my life, but I face them rather than avoid them.
If you had a similar background, I encourage you to get professional help. Do the work. There is freedom on the other side of pain…
